Friday, March 30, 2012

I will look at the bright side...

...I will look at the bright side...I will look at the bright side...I will look at the bright side...

We had our final walk-through early last evening. It felt disastrous. You want the whole ugly truth--I walked out of there and cried for half an hour straight. Over-reacting? Probably. I'm in the midst of a horrible fibro flare, I've been so stressed out for so long over this whole moving mess, and I've been more sleep deprived than normal...so my ability to look at things realistically is likely non-existent at the moment.

So here is my attempt at changing my piss-ass attitude:

*Okay, so it's a fixer-upper. We *knew* it was a fixer-upper. The fact that it's even more of a fixer-upper than we realized means that we get to make it even more into what we want in the end, right?

*Okay, so most of the backyard is now a big expanse of dirt and mud instead of grass due to the septic system replacement. But hey, we were going to have to rip up parts of it anyway to put in gardens. So essentially this just saved us some work, right?

*Okay, so I spent days scrubbing down every inch of our house so the buyer wouldn't have to do any cleaning before she unpacked and settled in, but the sellers of this house obviously feel that leaving it a *complete* shithole when they walk out is just fine. Hell, they weren't even close to having all their stuff out of there yet. Hmmm, so I guess I get the opportunity to get lots more exercise scrubbing the shit out of this house before we can begin unpacking...and who doesn't need exercise, right?

Yeah, this is a pathetic effort. :P To be honest, I think I'm over the trauma (melodramatic, aren't I?) of the walk-through. I'm not at all happy about the way the sellers are leaving the place, but what are you gonna do, huh? It is what it is. And in two weeks, hopefully my breakdown of last night will seem unbelievably silly to me.

But on another note, we had quite a unique experience last night. The fire alarms and flashing lights started going off throughout the hotel about 9:00 last night. We evacuated and stood outside freezing for the next half hour while the fire department came. They couldn't find the cause of the alarm though.

Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit. I really could have lived without hearing the weather forecast just now. About 4 inches of slushy wet snow predicted for overnight and tomorrow morning. Just what we need for moving day. Combine that slushy snow with the dirt/mud yard we'll have to navigate to get any of the big stuff in--yep, we're looking at good times...

*sigh*

I promise to get myself out of this funk and write a happy post real soon. Really.

13 comments:

Nymeth said...

:( *hugs*

Elizabeth said...

Well moving is never easy and I think you are coming through an extraordinary circumstance. Have you thought about hiring a cleaning company/ person to go through the house for you or even the kitchen/bathroom? I know it is an expense but it may be well worth it. You will have lots to do and to have the basic cleaning done could be the ticket. I know we did this one time and it was a sacrifice money wise, but was it ever worth it! I wish you much happiness in your new home.
Elizabeth

Kailana said...

I am sure everything would be fine. I am a bit appalled that they are not going to clean it up, though. Owning an apartment building I have seen some horrors, though, so I feel for you! Man, my mother bought a house that was originally scheduled to be torn down and they cleaned. What is wrong with people?

Amanda said...

You're allowed to be annoyed and angry! Sometimes, even when you know things are going to suck, it surprises you just how much they do suck. It will, however, pass!

Jean said...

Probably too late to do it, but Elizabeth's suggestion of a cleaning company has merit. Think of it as a health care (yours) expense. Your fibro does not need the mental or physical stress. As for the forecast, I think of Mother Nature as Lady Luck's hormonal older sister, so try giving it a chuckle. We'll laugh at the story over a beer or glass of wine this summer, okay? And keep in mind that fix-upping can take its own good time. Make a list, prioritize it, and do what must be done first. The want to dos can wait. You'll make it; you really will.

Heather said...

Dude, I'd be pissed too! What is wrong with people! Geez! I think Elizabeth's idea of a cleaning company has merit. Anything to help you out and give you a tiny bit of peace sounds worth it!

Not for the first time I wish I could come over and help you out. :( *hugs*

Eva said...

*hugs*

Fibro flares are the WORST! Seriously, as soon as I have one, I decide my life is the worst thing ever. And I freaked out at my sister last week (in the midst of one) over eating the last of a baguette I'd been saving and then laughing when I asked her about it & telling me it didn't taste good anyway. The next day I could see that she had been trying to make me feel better (i.e. you didn't miss much), but at the time it just seemed like so heartless & evil. I totally sobbed about it for fifteen minutes or something ridiculous. Baguette has now become a family codeword, LOL.

Ahem. My point is, remind yourself that it's the fibro & don't feel bad about getting super emotional/stressed/sad/etc. I'm lucky because I can just lock myself in my room during flare-ups & watch lots of comfort Netflix/DVDs from the library until the worst is over. I know you don't get much time for yourself, but seriously, an epi or two of some BBC costume drama or mystery while cuddling Thistle & a eating giant bowl of popcorn makes me feel SO much better. So I hope you can figure out a way to detox; I know your boys might be a bit young to understand (although my niece is v sweet/thoughtful about all my med stuff!) and I know you'll feel guilty just asking your family for some alone time, but it's really a form of medicine.

I also try to remind myself that when the flare-up ends, the world suddenly brightens, & that it *will* happen again if I can just ride it through.

I'm sorry that the sellers are so awful. The first home my parents bought belonged to a couple w two sons who had peed in all of the bedroom corners & smeared snot along the walls. Not to mention the 4 ft tall 'meadow' of weeds in the backyard where a dog had been left out & never picked up after. :O Mom says the only reason she agreed to it was because she didn't have her glasses on during the walk through! & my sis and I weren't allowed in until they'd pulled up all the carpet & given it a ridiculous amount of cleaning. But it ended up being such a snug and lovely little home; I'm positive yours will be the same.

It really, really sucks that you have to do so much (*especially* since you have fibro) & I hope the weather today was better than forecasted! I'm sending lots of love & positive thoughts your way!!!

DesLily said...

ah nope you are not melodramatic. it's called having reached your limit (due to living in a hotel) and the fibro. Sometimes change (even good change) takes a big deep breath and letting it all sink in and as soon as you dig into the problem it starts to ease up. if you go there today... before anything else.. build a snowman! enjoy the snow with the kids (that means Rich too!) then take that deep breath look at the house and smile and realize you are away from the bad things you wanted to get away from...then get out the mop ..(sorry about the last part) :o) wish I could be there to help and I hope the fibro eases up ! I have a friend here in fla that has it so I have some idea how badly it hurts! :o(
remember: deep breaths, and build a snowman!

Trish said...

Oh Debi. it's ok to be dramatic--even overly-dramatic at times. But I love this post for the brightside and the sarcasm and the shits.

It's probably too late now, but can you save yourself the grief and stress and pay a cleaning service to come in? I know it's an extra expense that you don't want and probably don't need, but...

Carl V. said...

I am so sorry...this whole post is like a real life example of "when it rains, it pours!". I do think you did an admirable job of trying to put a positive spin on things, but really it is okay to be upset and frustrated over all this stuff. One day you will look back on it all and tell fun stories, but for now you certainly have earned the right to be frustrated! :)

Heather said...

Want to send love and hugs. Hope things are much much MUCH better than you expected. LOVE YOU!!!

Jason Gignac said...

Love, love and love to you. I've moved enough people into and out of embarrassingly bad hovels, I completely understand. *hugs*

Care said...

OH my. Gentle hugs, can't wait to see the results when it's all livable and lovable.