Before I show my proof that I am actually keeping up with
Project Life this year, I want to apologize...for all the emails I haven't sent, for all the comments I haven't written, and for all the other ways I've failed in the friendship department lately. I don't want to complain, and I don't want to make excuses, but the only way I know how to explain is to just tell the truth--fibro has just been kicking my ass the past few weeks. I haven't had a flare that has been this bad or lasted this long before. Fingers crossed that it is a fluke and not a sign of things to come. Anyway, it has left me with little energy to do much, and for that I apologize.
But I have pushed myself to keep up with Project Life, be it in very simplified form. Keeping up is a good thing for me--I know from past experience that if I let myself get behind, I get very discouraged, and when I get too discouraged I end up quitting.
Okay, week 4. (Clicking on the pictures should make them bigger.)
Week 4 spread:
The left side:
Simple, simple, simple. The date card in the same style I've chosen for the year. The "what we did" card--and as we didn't have much going on, I was able to sew on a strip of matching paper. Included Annie's MCC class schedule since the spring semester started that week.
The right side:
Just a bunch of seasonal pictures. For the four bottom right slots, I just printed out a picture of frost on the window at 8x10 size and cut it into pieces before adding the chipboard letters. Think I'd like to do a page like this for every season this year, because our four distinct seasons are one of the things I love most about living where we do. Now if I can only remember to actually do it...
7 comments:
You do not need to apologize for taking care of yourself, lady! No! You come first, because your family needs you first and in the best shape possible. As for winter, are you getting today's heat wave? It was 60 degrees when I worked out this morning at 6:00. I was not wearing shorts, but I was wearing short sleeves. Back to normal tomorrow, though, with freezing rain in the forecast here. You take care of yourself, hear? And be on the lookout for a package for Annie.
So sorry you've been feeling poorly! I hope things look up for you soon. Great job keeping up with Project Life in the thick of it all, though.
Jean,
Thanks, dear lady. :)
And yes, we did have freakishly warm weather here yesterday--a high of 64! Bizarre. Of course, you'd never know it this morning as the ground is now again covered in snow and winds are howling pretty ferociously.
Ali,
Thank you. On all counts. :)
Debi, this may be over the top, but I want you to know that you are my inspiration. I've lived with chronic pain for the past eighteen years, but things have changed recently. What used to be my flare up level is now my baseline.
I get so discouraged and sometimes want to quit, but I read your posts about the things you do and how you cope and I keep moving. You have such a wonderful attitude even when you're down. Thank you.
Snowball,
I wish I could express how much your incredibly kind words mean to me! Though I had no idea that you lived with chronic pain, and well, now my heart is aching. It's funny--I always worry that I'm coming off as whining and complaining, and that is the last thing I want. Not that I don't think people have the right to complain and vent, sometimes that helps. It's just that when you've got one of these invisible illnesses, or any illness for that matter, it really is a part of your life. And since I seem to talk about everything else in my life here, it feels a bit disingenuous for me to hide that. Anyway, I wanted to let you know that you've become a regular dose of happy in my life. I can always count on you and your blog to give me a boost of positive...and we need to grab as many positives as we can get, right? I guess it helps that we seem to share very similar worldviews, but I don't know, there's just something sort of intangible that makes your blog a special place to me. And now knowing that you're living your life in chronic pain I think that specialness will only be stronger. I guess that sounds sort of stupid, but it's that connection of knowing someone understands, if you know what I mean. Anyway, thank you again for your kind words. And I will be hoping like hell that your new normal improves. I so wish I could hug you! Gently, of course. :) And while I realize you probably have people in your life covering these bases, if you ever feel like venting and just talking, don't hesitate to email me, okay?
Oh Debi! It's not whining or making excuses to mention you're in a flare-up. It's just a fact of life. It took me YEARS to accept this though, and to realise that other people really, truly don't see me as letting them down just because I'm sick, so I understand why you feel the way you do. And I hate the invisibility aspect too: I often joke that I wish I turned purple when I was having a flare-up so everyone could see the problem.
On Monday I had to list out all of the ways that my illnesses affect my daily life. I just brainstormed, because my dad said he'd format it to save my fingers, so only did a list in Mac's version of notepad, which doesn't have any formatting, so I guessed it was a page or two. Later, my dad printed out a hard copy of my brainstorming (each sentence was on a different line) and it came to SEVEN PAGES. :OOOO And it didn't even include everything, just the relevant stuff. That was so eye-opening for me.
Both our lives have many, many positive aspects, and it's lovely to focus on them. But I think it's just as important to take the time and space and emotional energy to look the effects of fibro in the face. You know? And come out the other side thinking "Yes, I am disabled now. It will change my life, narrowing my options. So let me get the richest life I can out of those parameters, and be gentle with myself and my body for not being able to function as well as a healthy person."
I'm rambling! But remember you can always call/e-mail/tweet me if you need someone to vent to. And that our friendship transcends all of that, so if you're not up to calling/e-mailing/tweeting/commenting, it doesn't affect us at all. *hugs*
*blushes*
Debi, your wonderful words brought tears to my eyes. And thank you so much for your offer to 'talk.' The offer is open to you as well. I am fortunate enough to have wonderful support, but occasionally words from someone who actually understands first hand are invaluable.
Also, I love your "project life" project.
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